Kc went back to work today.
I've been so incredibly spoiled, in that, as a new mom, I've had him home for the last two months, and with that brought a lot of help. A whole lot of help.
Today was a l.o.n.g day to say the least. :)
It didn't help matters that my body decided to regulate itself today. Joyous.
I feel like I'm now officially starting my role as a stay-at-home-mom. These last few months have been so out of the ordinary, I've grown accustomed to having an irregular schedule. Even though it was the bane of my existence at times, (my fussy, non-regulated/scheduled baby goes to prove that!) and something that I often complained about, I do feel a bit nervous about now being home ... all alone with an infant.
Being a SAHM has always been my dream, ever since I've been a little girl. This is and has been my desire and I'm SO incredibly grateful that God is allowing me to fulfill what I feel that I've been called to do. I honestly thought this day would never come. (This is coming from a girl who thought she'd be married by 21 and kids by 24 - ha!) It is a calling. It is a privilege and a blessing in my life.
However, now that it's here ... it's hard. And lonely. And seemingly impossible.
I never like change. I like things to be status quo. I don't do well with new things.
So, with that in mind, I know that once the baby and I settle into normalcy, everything will look perky and dandy. But until that happens, I'm nervous and uncertain about this new job that I've been called to do.
My sister-in-law has tried to talk me into joining a local MOPS group for this fall in the hopes that I could meet some fellow young moms in my area. We live in an older neighborhood and know zero of our neighbors, so a venue like this would be helpful in getting to know other women.
I'm also going to attend a day class of BSF this year, rather than attending the night class like I did this year. Again, another opportunity for me to get out of the house and with other people.
We are a one car family, so transportation continues to be a struggle but manageable. Many, many other people are able to do it and so can I.
I'm already beginning to see the importance of spending time with my God and drawing comfort and support from Him. He's given me this job and He's not going to leave me to do it on my own. On the contrary, He's promised to give the strength that I need for each and every moment - not a minute too soon.
With all that to say, it was a beautiful thing when Daddy came home this evening. :) Bennett and I were most pleased.
3 comments:
Being a staying home can be so hard and lonely sometimes – especially when Daddy takes the car to work each morning. Sometimes the mundane gets so boring and we feel purposeless and in need of friends, but praise the Lord that even through these struggles He is faithful. My favorite verse recently has been Isaiah 40:11, "He tends His flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in His arms and carries them close to His heart; He gently leads those that have young." He will lead you! :)
We are a one-car family too and I'm thankful that Mike has learned how to take the bus at least one day a week. Though having three in carseats makes the idea of leaving the house seem overwhelming.
Being home can be lonely. And you might miss grown up conversations. Here's to finding a support network. And living your dream.
I sure do love you, my friend. Thanks for helping me know how to pray for you!
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